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Note – some people like going out with their friend’s exes because they’re pre-approved.

Being friends with the exes of their friends elevates them and they may even enjoy listening to these people expressing their hurt over the breakup and then…

Here’s the thing: Some people love collecting exes.

I don’t mean that they go out of their way to make partners into exes by botching up relationships (although I suspect some do sabotage to resist commitment and then console themselves that they’re Really Great People ™ and A Really Good Ex ™) but more that their ego needs almost constant supply from the pool of people who have tried to forge something with them in the past.

When it’s genuine friendship, this is self-evident and unforced. It’s not baggage because the friendships are not being carted around as a way to avoid letting go and/or as symbols to reassure the ego.

If a someone is in the habit of remaining in touch with all of their exes, their ex love interests who they didn’t reciprocate the feelings of and even their friends’ exes, these ‘friendships’ are important to their ego and are serving a purpose.

Their motivations and lack of self-awareness cause a pattern of problems. Yet another woman/guy who can’t control their emotions and is falling for me. All I want to do is ambiguously be friends with them and they all go and get the wrong feckin’ idea.

If a person collects attention but is pretty indiscriminate about it and doesn’t have a harem per se (like people who trawl for attention on introduction ‘dating’ sites, Facebook et al), they’re more of an attentionphile.

Talking with a friend recently who was rather enamoured with a chap who was super ambiguous, a little probing revealed that this guy has a hell of a lot of female friends. Like when you see those shows about hoarders and then can barely move for all of the stuff piled up around them and they feel super attached to stuff that they’re never going to use or appreciate for that matter.

This guy collects exes, love interests that he’s turned down as well as becoming friends with the exes of his friends.

A few days back one of my friend get into trouble when he lost his mobile phone in a weekend party.

He had to made some very important phone calls including calling his girlfriend.




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